Thoughts Without a Thinker

We have a new addition to the family. Say Hello to Hank.

2007-10-25T10:55:00.001-05:00

Hank, originally uploaded by partiallyblind.

Joshua has always wanted a Basset Hound ever since he was a little boy, and though I'm not much for close encounters of the slobbery kind, I also think that such a good man deserves to get what he wants out of life now and again. Now don't get me wrong, I love dogs. I'm just not the biggest fan of the slobber that gets flung and dripped and dragged all over the place with the floppy-faced ones. The dogs I've loved most in my life were the relatively neat-faced ones that never slimed me or the furniture and never stunk up the house. But just look at that face. It can melt even the iciest of Cruella De Vil hearts.

We took him to the vet yesterday (with fingers crossed) to get him up to date with his shots and make sure he didn't have any major health issues. The woman at the shelter told us he seemed to have a bit of a cold, and the vet confirmed that he did have a bit of an upper respiratory infection (which is not uncommon in sheltered animals). We walked out of there with one helluva vet bill and a 10-day supply of puppy anti-biotics, de-worming medication, and a six-month supply of flea treatment and heartworm pills. So other than the green projectile snot coming out of his nose, he's a perfectly healthy hound. Funny how since I'm not a huge fan of doggie face fluids, I've been given one helluva sneezing, wheezing snot factory to fall in love with. The Universe is quite the little prankster, and silly little me has fallen for it. Snot, slobber and all.

This about sums it up...

2007-10-12T12:37:00.000-05:00

I'd forgotten how much I love the movie Clockwatchers, it's a pretty comprehensive take on temp life. Not that I'm complaining, my current assignment is with some really nice people. I'm just up at the front desk, alone, being seduced to sleep by the buzz of the flourescent lights. The office is library quiet, the call volume is really low, and the only people that walk through the door are FedEx and UPS. So without music or feeling ok whipping out a book or magazine, it's just you and me. Whomever you are.

Tiny Surprises

2005-11-21T23:42:00.000-05:00

I've been busy feng shuing and color coordinating my new apartment to death. My favorite interior design colors are currently pumkin orange, avocado green & mustard yellow (living room & bedroom). Closely followed by pink, red, black & white (kitchen & bathroom). And thirdly, mahogany and antique blue (meditation & yoga room).

Color me happy having a 2BR, hardwood floored1950's apartment all to myself. Color me happier that my rent tallies in at just under $480 a month, and it's not run by slumlords.

Oh, and they allow pets, and I'm walking distance from the coffee shop I used to work in and a gourmet pizza joint.

I love this town!

The week has been pretty busy with moving, insane workdays and showing my support for a couple of friends.Last night was full of champagne and losing sleep like the rockstar 9-5er I am.

Everything I've expressed a true need for, I've received. I went from my life being overstuffed with things I didn't care about anymore, to fitting my entire existence in my car and taking a huge chance, to figuring out where home really is and living a life that totally takes the cake over the one I had a year and a half ago.

I'd say things have come full circle.

I'm sorry, Yerba Mate. I've been unfaithful.

2005-11-10T21:08:00.000-05:00

It is confirmed. It is high season at work and I am addicted to the hustle. I have hit the pavement running with more motivation than a pair of $300 trainers.

My newly found love is black coffee in the morning. I wake up excited and giggly for it, like a schoolgirl with a 21 Jumpstreet Johnny Depp poster in her locker.

I heart Ebay!

2005-11-08T22:30:00.000-05:00

This lamp shade is insanely sexy, however I'm not paying $100 for no stinkin' lampshade.

So instead, I got this for under $20:

No more lamps with bare bright blinding bulbs.

Yay!

2005-11-08T07:09:00.000-05:00

So after a year of being a nomad, I have found my own space again. I have found the perfect 2-bedroom apartment for $500 a month, and the following is a list of eleven things that make it awesome:

1. New fridge
2. New stove
3. New air-conditioning unit w/ remote control
4. Did I mention 2 bedrooms? Alllll mine. Oh yeah.
5. Hardwood floors
6. Porcelain tub w/out pitted finish. It still shines!
7. Washer and dryer hookups
8. An actual separate kitchen w/ enough space for my cute little 1950's dinette set
9. A front porch where I shall put a tiny wrought iron table and 2 chairs, and surround them with my potted garden in the springtime
10. Beautiful, quiet neighborhood 5 minutes away from downtown & 15 minutes away from work
11. 15-minute walk to the coffee shop

On the work front, busy season has begun. I have adopted a method of minimal procrastination and have refined my task management skills in such a way that most tasks are completed within an hour of hitting my inbox. Files that require my sole attention spend no more than 24 hours on my desk until completion. We hired my assistant today, I think she's gonna work out. Praise Jesus.

My nursing school application is still awaiting completion. All I have to do is write an essay, but I have anxiety about taking it out of the envelope and filling in the missing parts. The idea of looking at what I still need to complete makes me wince as if I'm unzipping a body bag. Perhaps writing the essay would have been easier if I had written it during my first week of nursing school inspiration. Oh well. I'll still write something pretty stellar and inspiring, it's just a matter of being able to focus.

Another Girls Night

2005-10-22T01:00:00.000-05:00

Tonight was craft night at Jayme's, and I haven't had this much fun with a group of girls since that weekend in Oriental where we infected the whole house and dock with our contagious laughter. It's so inspiring getting together with creative and intelligent women whilst knitting.

A meditation on Abundance

2005-10-22T00:54:00.000-05:00

So last night was girls night out at Humble Pie, during which I find out that I won $300 worth of awesome stuff at the Hatchetfest raffle a month ago. I remember drunkenly buying 2 raffle tickets for a grand total of $5, then heading out shortly after that as a result of being super tired and well on my way to being shitfaced if I didn't head out of the bar soon.

During my weekend trip to San Diego a few months ago, Bobbi convinced me (quite easily, I must say) to go play BINGO at the Indian Reservation. I won $150 my first try.

The first (and only, I might add) time I ever played the football pool at work three years ago, I won $50.

A few weeks after my return to North Carolina, I was offered my old job back (which was really difficult to leave in the first place) with a substantial raise. Not to mention that it has been hella busy and I get paid commission!

The common denominator between these events is that I did not invest any expectations or worry, nor do I victimize myself over things I'm "lacking" in my life. Ask and ye shall receive, and I accept these gifts with endless gratitude and feelings of worthiness.

First on my agenda is to repay my debt to those that have been kind to me in my hours of intense need. I would not be where I am today if it were not for the generous investment of others, and repaying them is not a source of stress, but a source of joy.

Blessings to those who have been generous to me, and gratitude to the source of their generosity. May what they give come back to them threefold.

So it's been a while

2005-10-13T22:51:00.000-05:00

And I guess it's because I'm deep down a pretty private person. But just to keep everyone up to date, I've moved back to NC, gotten my old job back with a pretty sweet raise, am applying to nursing school, and taking a shitload of time to myself to relish in the fact that I am happier than I've ever been in a long time. I've missed North Carolina so. It's good to be home.

Another unemployed Los Angeles morning

2005-07-28T12:02:00.000-05:00

Being the crackhead that I am, I wake up every morning usually around 6 or 7 due to my stubborn circadian rythms and contemplate why I'm here, what I've experienced so far, and fantasize about numerous future possibilities. I lie on my IKEA mattress on the floor in my barren yet peaceful room and watch the sky turn from pink to gold over the quiet Toluca Lake rooftops until bodily cravings for caffeine, food or my morning bathroom ritual rouse me out from under my duvet. My morning is spent with little to no outside stimulation: no music, no writing, no reading. I just lie there and think. This has been a meditative experience so far, and it would be almost mindful in every task except for the past and future memories that keep bubbling up to the surface.

I've managed to keep food in my belly with various receptionist temp jobs and freelance work, but being here is just sinking me further and further into the kind of debt that seizes me with a cruel panic. I've given up being worried about it and instead focus on a multitude of options I have before me. I have abandoned my comfort-oriented state of mind and have replaced it with a sort of aimless gypsy mentality. There are so many things I love about this city, but most of them are the personal attachments I've made here and the free or next-to-free simple pleasures I've discovered here: hiking in Runyon Canyon in the Hollywood Hills, taking the tram up to the Getty Museum, strolling through the freakish crowd at Venice Beach, sneaking into private, maximum security beach accesses in Malibu, driving up the Pacific Coast Highway, movie screenings at the Hollywood Forever Cemetery, walking through Griffith Park, and the strange familiarity of sitting in Footsie's (a surrogate Jackpot little dive bar in Highland Park where the most popular drink special is "Samara's Backyard" - a shot of Jeremiah Weed and a can of PBR for $5.)

I have not written much here because I've simply felt uninspired to share my superficial depression with those of you who might be reading this for fear of giving it a perpetual power over me. I've lived in denial of it, ignored it, distracted myself from it in so many ways, but in the end it is still unavoidably there. Having spent much of my early adulthood learning how to overcome this sort of destructive mindset, I refuse to surrender to it. I did not come out here to run away from anything unless it was the fear of losing my heart. I did not come here as a result of already being depressed. I came out here to break away from all the comforts I'd become addicted to, to completely downsize my material existence (which I've achieved and then some), to put complete faith in and get more in touch with the forces that guide me, and to prove to myself that this type of faith will always lead to happiness in the long run in spite of what initial expectations I had of how it would manifest.

Since I made the decision to let go and follow my own heart, I've made some intense connections with people all over the map. These connections I've allowed to flourish since I left NC have reminded me of just how beautiful and generous the world can be. These connections consist of not only the people I spent time with while on the road, but the people I've gotten to know better here in Southern California and my own friends and family that I left behind. I love each and every one of you with an intensity I've not felt capable of before, and I realize the responsible force behind that is discovering the love and respect I have for myself. I went in search of my heart and found it mirrored back to me in every soul that's touched my life.

But the time has come to do something different.

I have no regrets.

Hold on to your seats!

2005-06-16T16:04:00.000-05:00

So I'm sitting here, minding my own business submitting resumes to temp agencies when all of a sudden the whole apartment starts shaking and the doorframes start creaking. Now unless we've been suddenly invaded by dinosaurs, we've had the biggest earthquake Airika's sister's felt in 8 years. That makes 2 in one week! Instant messages flood in asking "did you feel that?!" Haha...welcome to California. Magnitude 4.9!

Now the artwork we so carefully hung is all crooked.

June Gloom

2005-06-14T01:58:00.000-05:00

So we are dead in the middle of June Gloom. Each morning greets me with grey skies which eventually burn off to reveal a lovely haze that shrouds the surrounding hills. But regardless, I had loads of fun this weekend.

On this past grey and drizzly Saturday morning, I drove up to Camarillo to meet up with my friend Adam and we hopped in his car and drove up the Pacific Coast Highway. The skies cleared up the further north we went and the day was filled with winding roads, tunnels through the Santa Monica Mountains, good conversation, and my random music collection. We found a perfectly unpopulated beach spot just off the highway, a little south of Hearst Castle, where we sat and watched a couple of kiteboarders trace graceful arcs across the waves. The cherry on top was watching a speedo and bikini-clad middle-aged couple prance their way down the beach in the shallow waves in a sad attempt to pass their spastic movements off as some form of jogging. Nothing like spending your day on the shore catching a buzz in an aimless frame of mind.

On Sunday, my friend Alex took me to lunch at Toi where we had the most delicious Pad Thai and a pumpkin, eggplant and tofu dish over a bed of delectable brown rice. After a mild debate about her accent, we discovered our waitress was from Wilmington, NC. It was kind of nice to hear the sweet sounds of home right smack dab in the middle of LA. I must admit that this whole poverty thing has me a bit homesick.

After lunch we braved the freakshow that is Venice Beach. I decided I needed a pair of rose-colored spectacles to brighten my outlook and Alex found a pair of Elvis sunglasses. Can't beat that for $3 a pair. So we donned our cheap sunglasses and walked down to Muscle beach where our relaxation under the palm tree was suddenly interrupted by the splat of birdshit on my bare shoulder. Much tear-inducing hilarity ensued. We passed a huge drum circle on the beach and watched some pretty badass breakdancers before we wandered into the German beer joint recommended by a couple of girls sitting outside at the hookah bar. A pitcher and a plate of nachos later we headed back to the glider swing in my quaintly landscaped courtyard to enjoy the cool evening breeze as the setting sun cast its pink glow upon the surrounding hills.

Here's to new friends.

Yeah. So...

2005-06-10T20:07:00.000-05:00

It's been a while. I'm having a really hard time right now. I'm highly employable and I've applied for over 50 jobs and I have nothing to show for it. I only have $13 left to my name. I don't get it, everything else tells me I should be here. These mixed signals I'm getting from the Universe are a tad bit confusing.

It seems you have to know someone in order to get a job in this town, and I'm wondering if I know enough people. Feeling like this makes it really hard to stay positive, and finding a job is even more difficult when you're not positive.

I'm pretty damn stubborn, but I'm not quite sure how I'm going to figure this one out.

Jobhunting, Makeovers and Produce, etc.

2005-06-01T11:09:00.000-05:00

Well the job just wasn't working out so I nipped it in the bud. I had a lot of hope and expectations for it, I'd hoped I could really help this guy get his business running smoothly. Our priorities and methods for doing things did not mesh as well and I'd hoped, so on to the next thing. It's weird, I'm pretty tenacious with jobs and I don't quit them easily, something in my gut just told me I shouldn't be there. So back to the drawing board. I've applied with a health food grocery chain, the only availability is the meat department. I'll try the other locations today to see what pops up. In the meantime, there's always temp agencies, hopefully I can find one that doesn't wait the standard 4 weeks before they place you somewhere. I've also applied at one of the neighborhood restaurants, and I have a feeling I should check in with the wine bar I almost got hired at a month ago. Trying to get a job in Los Angeles can be a pretty discouraging experience, I think the only other place that could be more difficult than this would be Portland.

So I spent the weekend helping Jason and Airika with converting the TV room into a new studio for Airika. Friday Evening I came home to find everything that used to be in that room crammed into the front room and the walls mostly painted. Saturday, Sunday and Monday were spent installing the floor and putting on the final touches. Everything is now moved back in and relocated from her studio space downtown, we just need to clean up the aftermath in the main room and find new places to put things.

On Sunday I went to the Hollywood Farmer's market with my friend Alex after stopping off to Amoeba Records to sell a few cds. I took the cash they gave me and bought the most amazing white cherries and strawberries which I used on Memorial Day to throw together the cheapest, yummiest sangria ever. Not to mention having one of the best blue corn tamales ever. I want to go every weekend now.

Once we got Airika's studio mostly put together on Monday, we celebrated with that double batch of strawberry/cherry sangria and my new favorite butternut squash and tofu dish.

I sold the remainder of my cd collection yesterday and I will hopefully receive the materials I need to start some of the temporary freelance stuff for my old job at the travel agency. That should hopefully tide me over while I search for stable income, trying to remain ever positive and hopeful about finding the right job. So today I will work on my food stamp application and check in with a few more potential jobs.

This experience is truly humbling.

Malibu

2005-05-23T11:36:00.000-05:00

Airika, Erica, Kelly and I packed a picnic and headed to Malibu yesterday. The drive through the Santa Monica mountains was breathtaking, I can't believe I live under an hour from such amazing beauty.
A really nice guy let us use his maximum security 4-gated beach access which wound down this beautifully landscaped cliffside smeared with a whole palate of colorful blooms. The water was entirely too cold to swim in, which made having to use the bathroom an ordeal as there were no public restrooms. I mean, how can you perch yourself on a rock surrounded by water as some siren for bladder relief with all those people watching?

Not much to report

2005-05-10T10:12:00.000-05:00

I have been really busy job hunting and helping Airika around the house and with the show coming up this Saturday. It's crunch week and she (and in turn, the rest of us) are starting to feel the stress. She's just gone to bed as I am waking up, I'm going to spend a good part of the day with Connie picking up/dropping off pieces for the displays.

I had a job interview yesterday with the place I really really want to work for. It's a startup mobile spa business that dispatches massage therapists all over the entire state of California, and they need someone to help run the business. The job sounds like an exact description of what I was doing for the travel agency, so I have every confidence I can excel at this job. The only drawback is that I'm not very knowledgeable with California geography, but I'm a fast learner and I like the idea of being an expert when it comes to the layout of this place. So I had a good feeling about the interview, I was unexplainably giddy on the drive home.

I will try to put up pictures very sooooooon...

Good Morning, California!

2005-05-10T10:01:00.000-05:00

The floor creaks under my feet as I tiptoe my way down the hallway into the kitchen. Everyone else is still asleep, as it is what most people would consider an ungodly time to be awake in the morning.

The tea kettle slowly drowns out the chirping of the birds as I wash up the few remnants of last night's dishes. I pour a cup of tea and get to work mixing up today's breakfast, vegan strawberry cornbread, made from scratch. I know that in a little while the smell of steeping coffee and the sweet smell from the oven will waft its way down the hall and rouse the rest of the house.

Airika will then do her zombie shuffle down the hall and plop down on the couch just as I'm pulling the warm, sweet bread out of the oven. Her eyes will light up as I ask her if she wants coffee, then we will sit together w/ our bedheads and giggle over the silly things that come out of our sleepy, inarticulate mouths as we break bread together.

I love living w/ one of my best friends. One that I have known for years, there's no comparison to that. Someone who has seen me at my best and worst and loves me even more because of it all.

But most of all, I love California mornings.

Irony

2005-04-20T23:14:00.000-05:00

I also love the fact that little Sinclair (who's not even 6) asked me what "irony" meant. Even better was that I explained it and he understood it.

Eliza Doolittle

2005-04-20T22:54:00.000-05:00

I am having to adapt to this very strange culture, and sometimes being from the South has its advantages in they are totally eating up my etiquette and charm. This town might make a lady of me yet...

In other news I impressed the pants off of this manager of a trattoria/wine bar (like, triple the tips I've ever made anywhere else), unfortunately they'd hired someone else. BUT she's not very thrilled so far with the new employee, so we'll see. There's also a part-time gig making jewelry which I will have more of an idea about next Wednesday.

Last night my friend Scott and I dined under the night sky (and a heat lamp, I might add. It doesn't take much for these Southern Californians to feel cold!) at a fabulous Mexican restaurant in Santa Monica. We had the Salmon tacos (not in the least greasy!!!!), a bottle of wine and the mango chicken enchiladas for under $20 a person. God I love this town.

It's what happy tastes like...

2005-04-19T01:37:00.000-05:00

i want to be drunk, riding a carousel, listening to extraordinary machine by fiona apple.

First week in LA

2005-04-17T21:30:00.000-05:00

Today Connie, Peter and I went hiking in the Angeles National Forest along the San Gabriel River, which we had to cross several times using our mad rock-hopping skillz. I like this area so much, we were only a 30-minute drive away from the trailhead. 30-minute drive from the ocean, 30-minute drive from the mountains. Gotta love it.

Chicago, IL to LA

2005-04-17T20:22:00.000-05:00

The drive from DC to Chicago was long and full of local radio. I found some good stations near Cleveland, OH, but I think I've had my fill of Led Zeppelin and Country Music, not to mention Christian Radio.

Chicago was a blast, Ian took me out Friday night with his girlfriend and 6 other ladies to Simon's, who have one of the best jukeboxes I've ever listened to. Katherine and I walked back to Ian's after the bar while Ian ran to get us veggie burritos from Quijote's. The. Best. Burrito. Ever.

Ian and Katherine had tickets to the Cubs game on Saturday, so I rode the train into downtown with them and headed to the Apple store to get my replacement ipod. Success! They had it in stock. After trading out my ipod I wandered aimlessly through downtown until I happened across the Museum of Contemporary Art. They had an amazing exhibit there called "Universal Experience: Art, Life, and the Tourist's Eye." It was a multi-media collection that focused on the perspective of a traveler and how what we encounter affects us. Perfect. After strolling through the exhibit I walked down to the end of Chicago Avenue to the shore of Lake Michigan. Sort of surreal to stand at the shore of a Lake and not see the shore on the other side. Later that afternoon I find that my replacement ipod isn't working properly, and after a very frustrating hour on the phone with Apple support I am told it has a defective drive and will have to be replaced. Utter frustration and disappointment. I met up with Ian shortly after and we grabbed Sophie and headed to Huey's where I had my first Chicago-style hot dog complete with a pickle spear, tomatoes and cheese. I don't care what my friend Alison says about them being weird toppings for hot dogs, it was awesome. It just so happened that our friend Mike from Raleigh was visiting Chicago that weekend, so we met up with him at the Empty Bottle where we saw Del Rey play. They were really really awesome.

The next day Ian and Laura and I had lunch with Mike, then I hit the road for my short (4 hours, I guess it's all relative) drive to St. Louis. I ate dinner with Arik and his family, walked around St. Louis a bit, then called it a day.

Arik and I got a bit of a late start on Monday due to a mild delay at the Genius Bar in the Apple Store in St. Louis. But hey, they had a working replacement ipod so it was worth the wait. We hit the road at 3:30pm and drove until I couldn't see straight, which landed us in Sepulpa, OK.

From Sepulpa on it was down to serious driving business. We drove through Oklahoma, Texas, and then to the New Mexico/Arizona border where we stopped and had a fine Mexican meal. Arik and I were taking pictures of the town when a Navajo and his wife stopped Arik and asked him to take their picture and mail it to them. We talked to them for a bit, he taught me how to say "thank you" in Navajo, blessed us and my car, and wished us a safe journey.

So yeah. The last day we drove from New Mexico to Los Angeles and it was insanely windy. I'm talking 35mph winds and a speed limit of 75. Thank god I had so much stuff weighing my car down or we'd have been flipped over off the side of the road somewhere. By the time I hit the LA freeway the numbness in my body and my brain had me operating on auto-pilot. I arrived at my new home exhausted, hungry, disoriented and extremely emotional. Nothing a chicken burrito and a good night's sleep didn't cure.

So, here I am.

Washington, DC

2005-04-08T08:26:00.000-05:00

On Tuesday, Jack and I met up with Mandy and went to the Galaxy Hut in Arlington. It's a cute little bar with the nicest bartender ever and delicious beer on tap. Shortly after, Mandy and I headed to Dr. Dremo's for their endless draft beer selection and beautiful nightime view of the Capitol Building. Two pitchers and two hours later, we closed the place down and headed over to the Irish pub for last call. 1/4 of the way into our beers we made the adult decision to not drink our beers b/c we were already wasted enough. So it was off to Mandy's after a quick stop for nachos and ice cream at the "Arlington Sniper" 7-11.

I spent a good portion of the next morning walking around Arlington (I found an Apple Store, yay!) and then Mandy and I had amazing sandwiches at Whitlow's on Wilson (mine was a BLT with fried tomatoes, fresh mozz, and pesto...outta this world!) before heading into downtown DC for some museum action. We went to the Natural History Museum and saw some cool trilobytes before heading into the gem and mineral exhibition. AMAZING specimens they have there. I got to see the Hope Diamond, and it's beautiful, but not as grandiose as I was expecting. You know I'm a huge rock geek. From there we went to the National Gallery of Art where I saw a really cool Jackson Pollock (#17- it was a little different in style than his others and I really really liked it.) I also got to see works by Cy Twombly, Ross Bleckner (Birds Falling-really moving and breathtaking), and Jasper Johns before we headed to the Toulouse-Lautrec exhibit. I'm pretty familiar with a lot of his works, but actually knowing the history and names behind the people who appeared in them made a huge difference in my appreciation for them. We then did a quick scoot through the United States Botanic Garden just before it closed, then headed to Teaism to rest our tired feet and sip some refreshing Moroccan Mint iced tea by the Koi pond.

We then met up with Jack for some good old downtown DC barhopping. Our first stop was The Caucus Room, hangout for overly tanned and white-teethed politicians (you'd swear they were news anchors), then we headed to Le Bar (cozy chairs! I had the Cherry Blossom coctail) then on to Off the Record located in the lobby of the Hay-Adams Hotel. Another swanky politician bar, but it is by far the most beautiful bar I've ever laid eyes on and our drinks were served by John Boswell, famous for being the best bartender in DC. By golly I wanted to give him a kiss on the cheek, he was that awesome.

My last night in DC was a quiet evening at Jack's house dining on chicken curry and kumquat souffle pie.

I brought my sick ipod into the Arlington Apple Store yesterday morning and the drive has been officially diagnosed as dead. It is still under warranty, however they will not be able to have a replacement sent to the store before I leave. Fingers crossed that the store in Chicago will have the one I ordered in before Sunday. If not, then I guess my best bet is St. Louis. Looks like my 11-hour drive to Chicago today will get me pretty familiar with local radio, so please pray I don't fall asleep at the wheel from boredom.

On the Road, Day 3

2005-04-05T17:50:00.000-05:00

I've spent the past couple of days enjoying the local Lusby, MD culture with my friend Shannon who is an environmental toxicologist and all around rad lady. Yesterday afternoon we met up with her friend and coworker Kristy (who is moving to the LA area this summer) and we headed down to the shore where we picked out a choice fallen tree upon which to sit and enjoy Guaro coctails and absorb our serene surroundings. Talk about perfect downtime after hustling up to NYC and back!

Once the sun set we ventured over to Guido's, a local bar full of local drunks. We drank huge Yeunglings, played Keno, freaked out the regulars with our jukebox selections, and gorged ourselves on spicy wings, pizza, and fried shrimp. We then ventured over to another local bar (I forget what it's called) where I spent a good bit of time being silly with Kristy, taking shots of Patron, and discussing with the town drunk exactly why he shouldn't give a shit what other people think.

After nursing our royal hangovers this afternoon, Shannon took me to her favorite greasy spoon, The Frying Pan, where we dined upon grilled sandwiches and banana cream pie and giggled at the stuffed black squirrel hanging above our table. Apparently during the holidays they dress the entire array of taxidermied fauna in seasonal clothing.

I am now sitting in a coffee shop in DC listening to the Rosebuds and drinking a Thai iced coffee while I wait for Jack to get home from work. There was no way in hell I was going to drive through downtown DC in rush hour. I may be crossing the threshold on many of my fears and doubts at the moment, but I'm not THAT adventurous.

On the Road

2005-04-04T09:38:00.000-05:00

Well kids, I did it. I am on the road, just me and my fully packed, weighed-down car. I have a feeling I'm going to be stopping at the Post Office today and shipping some of the stuff in the car to my new residence in Burbank. I'm starting to feel claustrophobic, and the increased gas mileage will probably balance out the shipping costs. Besides, once I get to St. Louis I'm going to have to put Arik and his gear somewhere, right?

The last few hours of packing on Friday night turned me into an adrenalyzed, freaked out, overwhelmed panic-monger, and I apologize to anyone that had to interact with me during those moments. I had plans with friends and if I had to finish packing up and sorting through everything that wasn't going with me, I'd have been up all night and would've missed out on spending my last night in town with some of the people that mean the most to me. Let's give my mom a huge shout out for being the saint that told me I could just leave the rest and she would stop by and take care of it. This is not the first nor the last time I will say that my mom is amazing. (Thanks, Mom!) I enjoyed my last evening in town relaxing in the warm spring evening on Jayme and Joel's porch swing drinking a glass of wine and hanging out with some of my favorite people. And of course that was followed by a quick trip out for a couple of drinks and more hugs.

I wake up at 7:30 the next morning to a torrential downpour. After downing some cinnamon rolls and frantically running about Jayme's house trying to get everything together, I finally hit the road at 9am. An hour later than I'd wanted, but that should still put me in NJ at around 5pm which would mean Mike and I could catch the train and be in NYC by 9pm at the latest. On a normal day it would have been an 8-hour drive. I drove for 10 hours in a monsoon and suffered some major delays outside of DC. I get to NJ a little after 7 and we hopped the train to NYC. Of course my brain is fried from all the stress I'd been under and the Xanax I'd taken on the train, and since neither of us were very familiar with where we were going we took the wrong subway and decided it would be easier to just walk from the West Side to the East Village. We got to the bar a bit late, but it was good to hang out with friends and meet some new people. Besides, getting there late meant I didn't get embarrassingly trashed. So after taking the last train back to NJ, we had 3:30am White Castle burgers and called it a night.

I slept until 1pm yesterday!!! Go me! (If you know me, you know that my body is wired to ALWAYS wake up no later than 9am regardless of what time I go to sleep.) So after some traffic delays on the Bay Bridge over to Annapolis, I finally arrived in Southern Bay Area Maryland around 9pm. After spending a couple of hours catching up, Shannon fed me Chicken Marsala and ice cream and I subsequently passed out.

So here I am.

Sick Day

2005-03-21T13:49:00.000-05:00

So as you can see, I went to NYC about 3 weeks ago and I still have not written about it. Since I've gotten back I've been overwhelmed with giving my 4 week's notice at my job, being thrown into immediately training my replacement, finishing up some database projects now that my replacement has been trained, spending as much time as possible with 20 years worth of accumulated friends, and now I've gotten the nasty sickness. Again. This cold is just like a boomerang relationship: the minute you start feeling good again and thinking you can get on with your life, BOOM! It's back and it's been lonely and it wants to make up for lost time. This has been going on for TWO MONTHS. I want to put a restraining order on this stupid virus that keeps stalking me and threatening my physical and mental well-being.

I hit the road in just under 2 weeks, and I have a lot of stuff to do. Actually, that's an understatement. I have an impossible amount of stuff to do. <rant>I DON'T HAVE TIME FOR THIS!</rant>

Right now the perfect date would be someone to eat chicken noodle soup and nap with. And someone who thinks I am damn sexy with bedhead and a hacking cough.

Vacation

2005-02-24T07:04:00.000-05:00

Every now and then go away, have a little relaxation, for when you come back to your work your judgment will be surer. Go some distance away because then the work appears smaller and more of it can be taken in at a glance and a lack of harmony and proportion is more readily seen.

-Leonardo Da Vinci

So true, so true. I'm off to NYC tonight, I have a feeling this trip will inspire me, recharge me, and help me regain some focus. I'm going to spend time with quite a few wonderful people, I can't wait!

Have I mentioned today how much I LOVE MY HAIRCUT?! :]

Wow

2005-02-23T07:15:00.000-05:00

If nothing else, announcing this blog has brought quite a few of you out of the email woodwork, I'm excited to hear from you. Didn't know if some of you were still alive or not!

One cannot deny the empowerment of an awesome haircut. Carla Rea and Alex at Cherrybomb gave me a haircut that instantly made me looked like I dropped 20 lbs. I've been doing variations of the bob for years now, we tried a little something edgier and it turned out fabulously. Pictures to come if I get around to it, but frankly I've been a bit busy getting ready for my upcoming trip to NYC!

Oh well. Here's where you can get a sexy haircut too: Cherrybomb Studio

New Hire

2005-02-18T19:22:00.000-05:00

I work for a tour wholesaler that specializes in Central America. For the most part I love my job, even though it's chaotic, unorganized, and insanely busy. (Is that redundant?) I don't love my job for the work I do, I could crunch numbers anywhere. What I love about my job are the people I work with. We have four women (including Me, My Good Friend, Receptionist's Son's Baby Momma, and Sales Manager) and one man (Sales Manager's Baby Daddy) in one teeny tiny office. For example, I receive this in my inbox this morning. Everything referred to in this email is based on actual former employee conduct.

Enjoy!

From: [Sales Manager]
Sent: Friday, February 18, 2005 9:26 AM
To: [Company Name] staff
Subject: After long consideration.

Dear Friends,

After a long consideration, the [Company Name] business has exploded and we just cannot handle the business with our current staff. We are rehiring an employee with experience, talent and expertise. Although in the past, problems may have been faced with this employee, she has pulled it together and is ready to work.

The new employee will begin on Monday. We will re- position the office with [my claustrophobic good friend who hates the rehire with a passion]'s desk flipping around. We will add a desk on the opposite side facing each other so that employee sharing can work well.  Also I think a [Company Name] camping trip will bring us all together.  I will let you know who your tentmate will be.

Some new procedures need to be put into place.

Rules:

1. If you have a face powder compact, you must share it with the new employee. ("rehire" was a bit ocd and used to pick her face and then ask if she could use your expensive compact powder to cover up her oozing sores. she also liked sticking her post-restroom unwashed filthy fingers in your lipgloss without asking if she could use it first.)
2. If you have a problem with your spouse, you are allowed to scream at him in the office. This will create understanding between employees regarding each others lives. (there's a reason why we called "rehire" Jerry Springer)
3. If you have a chair, please pee on it. Then mix the chairs up. (we had an incontinent employee who refused to wear protective garments.)
4. New IM procedure. Please concentrate on IMing your friends. Maybe they will want to go to Costa Rica.
5. All files need to be incomplete, scratched out and have coffee stains. Samara needs to have some fun too. (i love fixing people's mistakes all day, i really do!)
6. Stress is always a factor with this job. I encourange you to bring crack to work. At 9Am every morning, we will "Hit the Pipe".
7. Please adhere to the new dress code. Miniskirts- Half shirts-Candies heels ([Baby Daddy], you can wear sneakers).

I am extremely excited by all these new changes!!! I cannot wait until Monday morning.   Have a SUPER weekend~!!

[Sales Manager]

It took my good friend halfway through the email to realize this was a joke, so watching her almost throw up on herself was priceless. We're so fucking fried from stress that we've lost our marbles. Baby Daddy sits at his desk and makes chicken noises when he hits his breaking point. We love to prod him until he snaps.

Thoughts Without a Thinker

2005-02-03T15:50:00.000-05:00

I dunno, I heard it one day and it just stuck.